Creep


I killed you in my mind

In so many ways

And I still find it’s a waste

Of time, of energy and tears

Of valueing you for so many years.

A shallow infatuated pompous ass

Full of fears, disfunctional brains

Who judges others just like him

Who thinks he’s God’s gift to women.

But the face falls off when least expected

And what is left is nothing worth it.

You pride yourself in having control

Over your emotions, thoughts and all

But, little creep, in mind you keep

Your turn shall come and make YOU weep.

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Remember


Rugged memories of shattered dreams,

Emotions walked all over by false pretences.

Moments of joy and love proven deceit,

Eagerly promising eternal bliss,

Mostly because it suited his needs.

Boasting great with little roast,

Evening come, he skipped the boat

Recurrent comings and goings, dementedly so

 

REMEMBER: What you give, will come back to haunt you and you will have nowhere to go.

Doubt


I doubt I will ever understand why

God gifted me to you.

I doubt I will ever understand why

You couldn’t cherish the gift of his love.

I would have moved mountains

If I had the luck

To be truly, so devotedly, loved.

I doubt I will ever see His justice at last

To put you in my place just once, when you expect it least.

You to have the misfortune of your medicine to swallow

See how you feel, what magic trick you have against the sorrow

Someone else makes you go through

Just because they enjoy using you.

See how you handle being dumped

Right after they showered you with love.

I doubt I will ever see the fairness God should be.

 

When God decided


When God decided

You should be born

It didn’t mean you’ll have what you need.

For some, he gifted people and things,

For others, altruism, loneliness and pain.

Good people who do not do harm

He decided should be resource to others to use.

Those who are unable to cherish his gift

He rejoices in like with his prodigal son.

When God decided what your fate shall be

You had no choice

And you struggled in vain.

He may have something good in store for you as well

But you may expire until you get there.

And if ever your needs should be met

You’re too old the joy of the moment to count

Too tired of waiting  a lifetime for what others always had.

 

Selfie


I look at my SELF in the mirror and I feel proud

My behaviour shouts me out loud.

The words describing me won’t be praise

Truth, honesty, empathy, love to give out I was raised.

I’m different from all those I got to know and did me harm

Who used my good nature then, suddenly, forgot the charm

The magic of being truely loved

May they never get  another chance from God.

Egotism


I stopped giving out my soul

People tread on it like it were dust.

I stopped hoping there’s left

Some decency in a world of lying and mistrust.

I stopped praying coz it seems

God has forgotten me like you… feels

Futile to hope in vain

Solitude is the only gain.

lonely2

Numb


Late at night i cried my heart

Sleepless dozens of nights i prayed you might

Grow a soul by the morrow

So that i haven’t drowned in vain in sorrow.

The morrow came mute as you are

The story ended without good bye.

You stole my life and killed your love one day

Like a coward, deaf and dumb,

Forcing me to become…numb.

Letter to God


Dear Almighty,

I have been your creation for half a century now

Led my life in honesty and love, it’s all i know how,

Of people who used me, then dumped me in such cruel way

Never wanted riches, humble was my every day.

You gifted me and left me to dry

The pain made me bitter, i wished to die.

You may not like it but shouldn’t be surprised

That, when you torture good people, they lose faith in Thy.

It’s only natural to give in when they beg you in vain.

You should love all your children the same.

I’m done begging and have one wish left:

That i shall get used to the loneliness.

 

Yours,

One of the few

Who trusted you true.

Life


Looonnnngggg waiting of something that never happens or happens so late you cannot enjoy it.

Infinite hope that if you do your best and are the best you can be, your needs will be fulfilled.

Fortune playing tricks on you and your life never being a choice you failed to make.

Endless dissapointment in God and humanity.